The fans of the first Matt Hazard game must have emailed the hell out of Vicious Cycle demanding that they develop something else to snap in half. So here comes another Matt Hazard game. One complaint about the first game was that the humor just didn’t hit. People didn’t feel it was “humor” as much as it was “ear cancer.” How do the developers of Matt Hazard Blood Bath and Beyond answer this concern? Do they kick the funny up a notch? Do they release a trailer filled with terrible humor? Do they write a level in to the new game where Matt Hazard does stand up at a college in Minnesota?
After what I’m sure was a huge debate, the developers decided on the trailer idea. I guess that was easier than hiring someone to write comedy.
As I’m sure you know, an unfunny trailer needs a good offensive cliche to be successful. Vicious Cycle could have spun a tale about a racist Nintendo character refusing to work with Donkey Kong or the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles trying on SS uniforms. But they decided to go with the ol’ standby of gay Ken Masters from Street Fighter.
We know it’s Ken because he does a shoryuken out of his chair and exclaims “I lost my passion for fighting. I wanna get it back!” (I bet he still has his passion for dancing, eh? eh?) We know he’s supposed to be gay because he does the stuff every gay person does — talk with a strange accent and play with his hair.
But wait, we’re not done. After a few other characters talk about some shit that you don’t really hear because you’re still amazed that their idea was to put a gay cliche in to their debut trailer for a sequel to a game that was accused of having terrible jokes, gay Ken is back with “I need it bahhhhd. And I’ll do anything to get it. Anything.” He plays with his hair in this scene too, so we know that “anything” really means “Dirtdevil skin off a penis.”
I think he's wearing eye liner and trying to bite his lip. Both those things are clear indicators of a condition known as "testicular gobble."
I’d contact Vicious Cycle for comment, but they’re probably too busy sending out inter-office memos featuring Jeff Dunham clips. The worst part about this trailer is that the gameplay looks kind of not terrible. Unfortunately, there’s a good chance that Matt Hazard narrates the entire game, and I don’t know how many times I can hear “that whale is after our booty!” or “that scorpion’s big stinger made me feel funny!” or “Suck my gun! Wow, I usually never let that happen on the first date!”
Mario looks like one of the Rats of NIMH raided Baby Gap
